Outing #44: I’ve got to leave town NOW..

May as well grab yourself whatever food and drink you like and get comfortable – this is one of those posts.

At 8,822 words spanning a full week it’s practically a novella, and I can’t see myself not easily cracking the 10,000-mark by the time I’ve added the last bits and a summary.

Day 1

Back a few weeks ago being homeless was alright. I still had work, money most of the time and the tafe to use for it’s kitchen, toilets and powerpoints. I had a shower and shave every day and, well it got pretty cold sleeping outside at night before the sleeping bag, but since getting it I’ve been warm and comfortable enough to fall alseep pretty instantly – often while trying to write or edit here.

Last week or two I’ve not been able to go hang out at tafe nor eat there or sunbake there or anything so I’ve had to hang around town like an actual fucking homeless person. Even that wasn’t too bad for the first few days, but then the balance shifted to unpleasant, and I’ve still got another 6 days straight with no money, no place and nobody.

Mark my words though: I’m going to move into a place next wednesday no matter what or who it’s with because I think far to highly of myself to allow this to continue.

The first time I’ve had privacy since I was down here a few weeks ago.

My head is starting to fucking throb.

I left my actual water bottle near the top of the giant staircase on a seat with some iced coffee in it still, and there was just no way I was going back up for a triviality like that, so this nescafe jar is all I have.

The RDA: atomizer of choice for the socially unacceptable

Obscene amount of vapor comes out of any sub-ohm tank, but the RDA is king. Because you have to manually take the lid off and drip e-liquid right on the coil and cotton within the coil, it is drenched when you fire the wire unlike factory-made coils that need to re-wick moisture into the cotton padding by capillary action which may as well be osmosis and I don’t have time for the cotton to sort it’s shit out.

I’ll write up this bit sometime: I realize it’s of no interest to anyone who doesn’t use a vaporizer, but plenty of people do, so feel free to scroll past this if it bores you.

As if the Universe hasn’t fucked me around enough; there’s only this much killer custard left – almost as upsetting as the bit of iced coffee I didn’t get to drink.

Day 2

I didn’t even bother to leave the creek last night, just walked across the track to the grass on the other side. I didn’t see another human being all day yesterday from the staircase on.

It’s 7:03am and I think I slept better last night than I have in days. I woke up once or twice to piss, and because I was too hot then too cold in my tops but would’ve fallen asleep at around 9pm and woke-up at 4am. I’ve had enough aeroguard on to make a horse feel sick, but it’s kept the bugs away since I got here ..except for this one bee yesterday and I saw in front of me on a flower.

I instinctively swatted it with my hand and hit it well enough that he just buzzed around on the ground on his back for several seconds disoriented and just as I’m about to slam the coffee jar down on this bee I realize ** That was wow that was completely uneccessary: that bee wasn’t even looking at me – just collecting nectar – why would I do that? **

I didn’t squash him, though he took a good full minute to recover and I felt pretty bad having to watch him flip and buzz around on the ground the whole time. No consideration for my feelings that bee; making me feel guilty like that.

…hang on I’ve gotta drink this coffee: disgusting as it is it’s still got caffeine and sugar.

Every time I see a photo of Moose I feel fucking gutted: he was a beautiful bird and I just mistreated him because I had no idea how to handle him and he loved me more than she ever did πŸ™

Only food I’ve got now, actually I only had one chocolate left in my bag that isn’t really food, but I ate that yesterday anyway.

Since I left town early yesterday to avoid the looks, I’ve come down with nothing but, really now, we all knew this was not going to be some grand outing full of possums and cute animal pics and stories: that camp is gone and even as I sit here now I’m seeing the clouds and hoping to fuck it doesn’t rain because I’ve got no water-proofing of any kind – the sleeping bag isn’t waterproof, the day-pack isn’t waterproof and this tablet sure as shit isn’t waterproof.

Still it’s not really at Outing without possums.

My vaporizer – that’s completely waterproof: IPX7 rated and shock-proof. ?

You see that shit up there? Yeah there’s a bit of blue but there;s a shitload more grey.

Obviously I do have charge left, and down here even in daylight it’s dim enough to use the screen at it’s lowest brightness setting. 100% charged now and the li-ion battery is still half full.

Rececption drops out a lot though and fails to load pages and photos are still difficult to upload first try,

I’m gunna have to go up tomorrow. I’m getting dizzy when I stand up already and I’ll be starving by tonight. Don’t know where I’ll get the food when I’m up there but i’ll get some and maybe then come back down. Closest I’ve had to a mel was a hamburger 4 nights ago; just cheese and cracker snacks and iced coffee since, and all Ihave now is black coffee and sugar.

There is a very fat skink I made a half-effort to catch yesterday when I got down here, but since then I’ve seen him running back and forth all day long, and figure he’s the closest thing I’ve got to company, best not try to eat him.

Lot of flies around today, not touching me but always buzzing nearby. Mmm. Two blow-flies in particular I reeally wanna kill..

That’s the one..

it’s 4:44pm and this time of night out here – even in the camp those 16 months – always makes me a bit sad; I hear the last voices of walkers and know they’re all going home to their friends, family and loved ones.

Day 3

I think I’ll stay out here again tonight, though not having anything but sugar and coffee and creek water doesn’t give me a lot to do, because I can’t prepare snacks or foods or anything really – just coffee and water though I don’t feel very hungry anyway.

Alright it’s 9:30am on the dot and I’ve had my morning coffee. I’ll have another one in a minute as long as I save enough coffee powder for tomorrow morning when I go up. Seriously praying the clouds to start spitting and solid rain would be, an unwelcome annoyance right now.

Same as yesterday but without any blue, and the air temperature is cold enough for condensation to surely ..no no it’s not gunna happen.

It’s 10:50am and I’ve got 46% on this tablet, I tossed the phone a few feet but that was about 85% last I checked, and the keyboard has eliquid and grass all over it.

I don’t know how but I’m not hungry. I think maybe the caffeine is reducing my appetite so I don’t notice hunger, and the sugar’s giving me burst energy but I’d certainly like a hamburger now.

You know, just thinking about that hamburger makes me hungry.

I’ll have to do something to distract myself and just drink the coffee.

Maybe I’ll rebuild my coil and wash-out the atomomizer for a time-killer; I’ve switched from the 6mg to 18mg peaches and cream because i’m running low on vaporizer charge and can’t be using the batteries as much.

1:32pm and it’s just started spitting rain. Hope it doesn’t go on too long.

The inherent problem with vaporizers.

All their’ batteries are running flat and the only one left has holes punched in it from my trying to lever it into the first mod with a knife, so it shorts and resets the mod regularly. It did that before I cut the protection circuit off the bottom to make the sucker fit, and does it just as often now.  God I need a power-point. 

All said and done the GeekVape Aegis is the best overall battery mod I’ve bought so far, that always lasts the longest and it’s my favourite: IPX7 waterproof, shock-proof with a battery as big as an ipads’ ..sadly it takes just as long to charge as an ipad, but that’s hardly a device fault – just an inconvenient situational incompatibility with my lack of power-points.


I had to replace the coil anyway, because I’d bent the wire of the one in the tank once too often an hour or so ago and it broke, but the resulting replacement is much better anyway: it’s just this BATTERY thing.

Probably the best coil I’ve made so far.

I’m trying to rush through uploading as many photos as I can because the net sucks and keeps dropping out. The rain stopped but looks not unlike it’ll start again. Hope not.

Beautiful.. almost.

Day 4

Positive attitude is all I’ve got to get me out of here and all the way up that fucking staircase good God I hate the Giant Staircase. Tell ya one thing though they didn’t exaggerate when settling on the name of the fucker.

By some miracle I found the battery for the second sub-ohm kit and it’s fully charged. Still don’t know where to charge everything in town where I don’t have to stand there watching it for four hours.


Federal Pass I actually mowed my way up this in about 20 minutes this morning.


The first flight up: I’d do just about anything to put off starting this bit.


There’s really nothing much nice about it once you’re on it: people ask me and I hear them speculate on how many steps there are 888, 950, 800, 1000 steps? I always use the same pre-prepared answer “…too many”

*.. ..Envy you for going down instead of up.

Feels as heavenly as it looks here too: the last flight, which isn’t actually this one but there’s too many people around the last two flights of stairs to take a photo without feeling weird.


My day all turned around at around 10:00am – a few flights into the staircase – with a text from my mother, “$70 in the bank hope that helps.”

** ..understatement of the YEAR, that shit is! ** 

I tell her I’ve got three 10c peices in my bag to my name and nothing else, and it will do more than just help.

Stopping by the church at around 11:30 this morning I discovered that the free lunch is actually on a sunday: The entire place was closed today, as far as anything I could eat is concerned so if not for my mother’s money I’d have come up here for absolutely nothing, then had to go back down *with* absolutely nothing. Could you imagine what a fucking RAGE I would’ve been when I got to town and discovered there’s not even a charity open who can feed me?

Thank god for mothers!! ??❀ πŸ™‚

had to destroy myself getting up that bitch of a staircase before 11:30am (to rush to the church before Rosa or the free lunch is finished for the day); shops are open well after lunch, so I can take my time, more now than before anyhow.

Iknow it’s not food, but it’s a comfort-consumable that’s still there to give me comfort when the food is no longer there to do that.


I swore I’d photograph the first food I’ve eaten in 4 days, but just could not wait and even now I can feel my stomach getting its rocks off on that tiny bit of calorie-packed awesome.

Immediately after stopping for tobacco I bought a hot sausage roll. They’re very small and only $2.50 or so, but I didn’t know whether I’d have to bolt for the toilet right after eating it. I haven’t had a bowel movement since Wednesday, seriously: there’s been literally nothing to shit since then.

It didn’t make me run to any toilet, nor did the iced or regular hot coffee I’ve drank so far so, yeah that’s too much information but whatever. Now you know πŸ™‚

The Library

The shit I gotta do, just to continue the dialog: I think the phone was at 6% when this was taken.. still only 30% now.

It’s 1:03pm and I’m in town, have stuffed a small sausage-roll and dare RAW iced-coffee in me (highest caffeine content of any of the supermarket iced-coffee brands) and have as many things plugged in to charge as I can find empty wall sockets: what 4 battery-powered devices I’ve got ..best I can do for now with only 3 hours until the library closes and I’ll go back down to Leura Forest.

I don’t even have the option to stay upstairs because my sleeping bag, extra tops, even my ipad are all in a garbage bag at the creek, and it’ll just be too cold and uncomfortable on concrete without the sleeping bag.

*.. asked some obviously gay dickhead in sailor shirt to fuck off and find another LAN socket. He did. I’ll insert the story later. ** I’m not being homophobic – the guy was a dickhead because he was having tantrums at his laptop, ended up hitting his mouse onto the floor when I told him, “You wanna go have your fuckin tantrum somewhere else dood you’re startin’ to piss me off with your bullshit.” Like I said, a dickhead.

2:06pm – 2 hours to go of power-point time and – given the amount of time I’ve spent here a week or so ago – I’m quite happy to sit around here until closing just to milk their sockets and fill my shit with juice.

I feel fantastic.

The same kind of elation I used to feel coming up after 11 nights of isolation at my camp back when I did the rainforest journals. though, if anything more-so today.

This time, I’ve not planned to go out and spend days in the rainforest before coming-up to town for payday and all the spoils: starvation drew me up the stairs and into town and everyone I see are fussing with their shirts and hair and all that while I just look like shit and don’t give a fuck because I’m going back out with the animals in a few hours and they don’t give a fuck what I look, act or smell like so long as I’m not trying to catch and eat their feathery arses.

A razor to take down today might be an idea though, especially if I’m down there another few days mm.

What food do I NEED down there.

Food that I need, I mean, that will fit in my pack and not weight a stupid amount.

Powdered milk has to come, plus the lowest-priced coffee or concentrate the supermarket has and sugar: it’ll all be iced-coffee with creek-water but it’s a good substitute for food and I don’t wish caffeine withdrawls upon myself thanks: my mother started putting caffinated beverages in my bottle when I was a baby because it apparently calmed me down, and ever since I’ve been old enough to reach and use a kettle, I’ve drank large amounts of coffee daily.

So coffee has to be in the pack, but only leaves a few dollars left for the actual food.

Bread, that’s cheap, chips, mm.. just have to see how much the powerdered milk/coffee/sugar is and see how much change’s left. Still though; if all I bought was powdered milk to drink down there I’d still have a (compared to the last 4 days) food-source packed with protein, fat and carbohydrates from the sugar.

Bread then: because carbs are energy food, yeah I’ll go with bread and something to go on it.

Only half an hour and the library closes. Soon as it does I’ll go to Woolies then continue back down the giant staircase, although I could go down furbers steps – that’s much prettier – that’s behind the caravan park and as ugly as it is, the GIant Staircase is still the fastest, most direct way down.

All this I’ve been writing this afternoon is a dogs breakfast as far as readable content goes, but (understand), I’m plugged into a power-point and it’s all free energy while everything’s still charging so I’m just spitting-out the text and photos without any editing as fast as I can, while I’m here anyway.

That’s it for the update from town: I’ve got 20 minutes to charge and want to stop using it a while. The 66 apps google play updated sure as shit didn’t get it charging at a faster rate but oh well.

Until I get back to Leura Forest.


Leura Forest – home sweet home

It’s 7:12pm and I’ve been back here about an hour. First some tourist walker walked past and asked if I had any spare water – I told him right there, the creek, then a female runner er ran – I guess – past, then finally one the woman had gone I rolled-out the sleeping-bag and started making instant iced coffee; shaken not stirred, because all I’ve got to stir with anyway are dusty sticks. I’ll delete that later if I cannot find a way to make it funny in SOME way.

Never as bad going down

The staircase was fine going down and I was actually thinking, that if I came out here weekends regularly and took the staircase regularly, it’d have to get easier the more I adapt to it.

So after several days out here I have got down a shade of brown: it’s been cloudy and cold then sunny and I can’t see the screen in full sun, so sunbaking took a back seat to writing. Still, the veins are up and the muscle appears to be forming another individual, visibly defined strap from the mid chest out to my shoulder there. Maybe I’m turning into the incredible hulk really slowly – ’cause I’ve got no fucking clue why everything is becoming so ..strapped looking.

..hang on, it’s almost 8:00pm and starting to get dark: gotta make another coffee before then beca.. well really I don’t need to explain.

That’s right: smack on the side of the road right on the creek and fuck anyone who bothers going anywhere further to camp: it just gets dryer, hotter and nastier for kilometres until the next section of creek. Why bother right?


That’s me each night since Wednesday. Rain is really the only elemental that can fuck me here.

Nevermind that on the water; it’s become too dark to even see inside the rainforest itself now. No I’ll regret NOT doing it ..

Alright so I bothered to get water, got there then realized I’d left the camera behind, then came back for that then sloshed through the mud a second time for the actual water. I almost didn’t bother gettin the phone but then thought, “How else will you know if there’s no visual?”

True too: pain in the arse to always think to take a picture of everything, but the more you do it the more it just becomes force of habit, but the boring daily stuff is easy to forget.

8:48pm and ants are crawling on me. Those little black ones should be in bed by now mm. Hope they’re not expecting rain. Hang on.

I’ve made me coffee, smoked some drugs and am in the sleeing bag and ..fuck the aeroguard is still over there…

Failing to even consider my head-torch I was in such a rush to leave this time, I have made-do with a make-shift camp lantern. I could get a much better lantern if I cut the bottle, but I’ve got another few days out here yet and need the bottle to function as intended.

11:27pm and animals are russtling and bashing around in the rainforest.

I don’t feel tired; must be the sausage roll and milk, but for the first time in the years I’ve lived here, I have climbed BOTH up and down the Giant Staircase in the same day and only a few hours apart.

A situationally imposed accomplishment, but an accomplishment. πŸ™‚


Day 5

Alright so though I didn’t get to bed until 1:00am, but slept until I about half an hour ago: the time is current 7:36am.

Morning Universe.

You know, I’m lying in bed earlier when it occured to me, “I can have coffee when I get up – milk and all!”, and remembered: amazing when you’re out here with near-on nothing, how something that small can be something you look forward to – a mental hook that simple can make an otherwise discontented day quite alright.

On this occasion however, I don’t feel discontented at all really: I don’t have much more than the coffee, milk and sugar, but I’ve got enough of that for at least 2 days. I’ve eaten within the past 24 hours (that sausage-roll; so small but so filled with fat, carbs and energy) and have a loaf of white bread in a bag that I’ve already had some of and ..I’m SURE that’s the same fat Currawong sits up around the base of the staircase and begs tourists and walkers (very successfully) for food. He’s a fuckin’ pro that bird. I’ve watched him beg people and he’s used the same routine on me (also successfully): only Currawong I know who’ll actually eat out of your hand if you give him no choice: he’ll watch you eat and hop and coo and aww and get closer and closer and he actually looks like a pet who’s really worried you’ll eat that whole roll and forget about him – he fidgets and paces and hops to get your attention, then if that doesn’t work he’ll come in closer, and if that doesn’t get him showered with food he’ll peck it out your hand.

Where was I..

Half the reason I always felt a million bucks on the last day of the old camp outings is I’ve been down here with fuck all but a limited supply of food, battery, everything for over a week so when I get to town with money in the bank I’ve suddenly got EVERYTHING: Unlimted food, unlimited power, unlimited smokes, unlimted humans. I’ll elaborate on that thought one day. Not today because it’s too early in the morning for pondering existential shit like that.

So far in the last hour several runners have, well run past, all said good morning and another dood (looked fresh off the set of an american sitcom – accent and all) walked by and stopped to say good morning. He informed me he was going to walk across the mountain today. I told him I’ve been further out: it’s just dry, hot bush for five kilometers until the next section of Leura Falls Creek, then dry hot bush another few kilometers until the next little bit of creek. He’s asked me if I meant the Kedumba River πŸ™‚

“Nooo.”, I tell him, “no that’s, ..a bit further :)”

Anyway I ended-up telling him to have fun and enjoy that, and he went on his way.

Todays to-do list is to wash my socks because they stink and I’m sick of the musty smell, and replace the coil and cotton in my atomizer again, but not for something to do this time: once I’d completely run out of smokes the other day, I got the genius idea to smear some of the black resin from my pipe directly on the coil figuring it should make it taste like real tobacco and I know how what-the-fuck that sounds, but just an hour before I’d actually made a genuine discovery of a very similar nature and I’ll add that now actually because yeah.

Most charming Currawong I know. πŸ™‚

Another runner goes by a few minutes ago, I say “Morning!”, and she replies, then I opine “Lot of runners today”, and she tells me, “It’s a great day for it!”.

** Great day for it. Wow that’s cheery! **

Ever since, I’ve said the same to all subsequent runners, and they all respond warmly.

I really should’ve gone to uni and studied psychology, though really isn’t every interaction throughout life a lesson anyway, and how could those lessons possibly be better tailored for you – in the context of a student – than the psychological interplay you engage in every day living your life?

Oh, and I ripped up some bread and tossed it around about 20 minutes ago, now different birds are starting to fly down and hop around to get their bit of bread. That currawong just grabbed all he could carry in his beak in one go – about 6 peices Ireckon – then fucked off. What a dood πŸ™‚


Mmm. Vaporizer first. then wash myself with the little bar of soap I just leave on a mossy rock now actually. Hotel soap – the animals won’t touch it, though I’ve seen supermarket bars of soap I’ve had with bites from animals before down here.

Smaller coil I made this time, hoping smaller with less turns would make it use less battery. Seems about the same though.

Moving along..

I haven’t edited the site live through the day because I’m seriously low on electricity and that method – though it keeps me occupied well enough – eats way too much power, so last night I downloaded an editor with syntax highlighting (for the html and css) and a dark theme. Since the app’s just a text editor I can switch the tablet to flight-mode which saves a huge amount of battery, and since most code editors have a dark theme – and why I created the dark theme for this site – most the screen is black, with only the text lighter – saving even more battery, so I can type and edit for hours without needing the internet at all, then just copy/paste the chunk of text when it’s done.

Also saves me the piss-off of pages timing out and costing me a paragraph here, an edit there, a whole page of text sometimes.

I’ve just finished a litre of banana flavoured milk and have to go fill the water bottle to make coffee before it’s too dark in there.

It is 7:06pm.

Behold – banana milk – some pretty exciting shit going down out here today πŸ™‚

Darkness falls, ..again

It’s 8:24pm and almost completely dark. My power-bank is flashing too; telling me it’s flat so this is the last charge: 94% on the phone for another two days.

If I come up Wednesday I don’t have to ask anyone for a thing.

8:40pm and I’m going to stop finger-typing on this phone and go finish todays entry in the tablet, though I most commonly fall asleep doing that,.. either way I probably won’t be updating again tonight.

Is it wrong to find myself so endlessly fascinating?

Day 6

Among the many epiphanies and fits of clarity I have had to endure the past few days and in spite of my blood currently containing more THC than actual blood, I’ve decided I’m going to continue with another rainforest series. Not another series: this series – *link:The Rainforest Revisited.

It could never be like the 16 month ordeal that was the first one: there’d be no fortnight-long outings, no backpackers, no Guido, Bobbi, Martha Hotdog, Daisy or Broeski because I’ll have a job and boring daily routine to groan my way through back upstairs, but I can still come out here regularly for a few nights.

I’ve also got another idea that’s even better than the Rainforest Journals and completely different, but I don’t want to say any more about it right now case someone raughts my idea. All I’ll say: it would be a radically different way of living, nowhere near a rainforest and very strange indeed πŸ™‚

But that’s an entire project with practicalities to be thought-out, and for another day.

Right now I have more immediate matters to attend, like packing my shit up in leu of impending rain and changing into the clean pants then getting my head around how to take as little of everything with me as possible, without leaving something I really need but fail to realize until I’m back upstairs and fuckin spewin’ I didn’t remember it when I was down here.

But, as long as I’ve got my devices and wallet *shrug* the rest is really whatever – or so it seems, until I get up there πŸ™‚

80% chance of rain in the afternoon today.

It’s 9:14am and there are french dickheads shouting back and forth to each other. Only inconsiderate cunts do that: people come out here for peace, not to listen to a handful of clowns with tubby guts shuffling around the mountainside carrying dumb sticks they’ve picked-up all call-and-responding like they’re some kind of mountain tribal people. Yeah no that’s not positivity so shoot me it’s fuckin annoying and have just shouted back for him to “FUCKIN SHUT UP DICKHEADS!!”, and all I can hear now are them murmuring.


In about ten minutes they’ll have hit the low point in the trail and begin ascending the mountain: dumb cunts won’t have the air to spare for screaming-out stupid shit, so I could’ve just waited instead of yelling-out at em.

..and just as predicted there it is: golden.

I gotta go and wash my face it’s just grimy with aeroguard, sweat and filth. Gotta take my shirt off too now the mozzies are gone; Iam in the forest afterall, may as well act like a mountain tribal person πŸ™‚

Doesn’t take much feeding to turn them into regulars πŸ˜‰

Actually I’ll go wash my underwear first, because clean underwear would be ..good: Istopped wearing them 3 days ago and they’ve been sitting in the creek ever since. Maybe they’re already clean? πŸ™‚

That bar of hotel soap the animals refuse to touch? Turns-out they don’t refuse, and have taken it.

Fortunately I’d already started washing the underwear so they were still soapy and now they’ve been washed and rung-out a few times they smell smell perfectly clean and soapy too, but there’s silt from the creek in the fibre here and there. Still, better than they were πŸ™‚

It is now 10:05am.


16% on the tablet and 70% on the phone.

Action-man that I am, I’ve moved from the edge of the creek to a little rock inset in the edge of the forest, because those blow-flies pissed me off all day long yesterday. They seemed to become inactive when the clouds covered the sun, then instantly moving and annoying when the sun came back out, and even in town flies just don’t annoy you as much when you’re in shade.

I’ll have to go up tomorrow I think, though I’d much rather sleep down here than up there on conctrete and I really don’t wanna take my sleeping bag, but don’t want to leave it down here either – in the likely event I do have to sleep on a slab of stone. I’ll run out of powdered-milk and sugar tomorrow – or today – and everything will be completely flat by tomorrow, so if I choose to go up the day after tomorrow I’ll be going up without even knowing the balance of my bank account and Idon’t care for that one bit.

There’s .. you know I haven’t seen a single leech the entire 6 days down here this time. I’ve even slept on the grass right next to the ferns every night. Ferns = leeches, so with none on me in the morning I can only assume it’s been too dry and cold for the fuckers latel.. fuck hang on, it’s starting to rain.

Gotta go get changed into my pants so I’m ready to go up to the caves at a moments downpour.

No need to get excited; they’re not gem-encrusted wonderlands, just man-made holes in the sandstone about as attractive as a public toilet, and half the size.

I’ll go up tomorrow morning. it’s settled.

Okay so I didn’t wash my socks yesterday when I said I would, and regret it now: there’s no time for them to dry if I wash them now, yet I know that if Ican smell em out here, people in town certainly will. But there’s no point wearing them wet, and whatever I’m bored talking about socks and you should be too.

I’ve gotta go clean my genitals now; get ridda that slimy-grimy blugh… be right back. I’ve defecated twice this morning and once yesterday – things are looking up πŸ™‚

Speaking of my dick, *..

I am completely naked in Leura Forest. Even walked over here just to type that; swaying, in, the breeze πŸ™‚


Okay I’ve got all my ducks almost in a row; just waiting on the socks to dry. My tablet has only 13% charge, but I’ve downloaded the same code editor on the phone and – since that’s at ~60% – should be able to finish-up the day with the phone and keyboard.

I just have to upload this chunk of update before the battery dies, so I can continue-on with the phone: I’ll get mixed-up of I try to skip the sequential order things are meant to happen in.

I washed them anyway, and found they actually smelt, well not at all after just a couple of thorough soakings and wringings. They’re on some fern leaves drying now, though everything else is ready to go so if it starts raining properly I’ll just put em on damp and, well it’s that or wear no socks the next two days because I’m carrying the only pair I have on me.

I don’t much want to sleep in the cave: it’s dusty and full of spiders. Hopefully I’ll see it’s not going to rain by about 6:00pm.

Reckon those socks might be almost dry by now. They were only damp about half an hour ago, and the air’s got plenty of movement today.


I’ve got to make sure I have a razor in my bag in future – that’s about the only thing giving me away I can’t fix before going upstairs: the 10-day growth. Makes me look homeless, and Idon’t even have scissors to have a bash at it.

It’s 2:09pm: all the walkers voices have gone, there’s a slightly warmer humid breeze turning into a wind and the sky is staying darker, longer.

God, I made a mental note of about 15 things to write down when I got back here, but I’m too distracted by the socks and clouds at the moment.

Hang on..


The wind is picking-up and getting colder: got get organized, which would be easier if I’d stop fuckin with my phone, but, shit the reception here is good – least relatively.

Even starting to get cold without a shirt.

Hang on, again. 


I’m up top now but far from dry, and have been trying to get my hair and hands dry enough to use a touchscreen and roll a smoke.

I’ll write the rest in flight-mode to save battery – 43% in the phone and, well the tablet’s at 6% or so and useless now.

You can’t see much even in clear weather because the rainforest cuts out 90% of the sun, and of course once the rain starts it’s dark as, well you can see..

8:44pm and 25% battery: I’ll call it a night, and carry-on with it tomorrow once I’ve got charge.

I can’t WAIT to envelope myself in this sleeping bag – I’ve been damp and cold for hours now.

Looks like shit, but so warm ..even the little rocks didn’t keep me awake.

Day 7


Last day today and – unless it starts raining again – I’ll be going upstairs to town. It’s not payday until tomorrow but I’d rather sleep on concrete tonight and be 1 minute from the shops when they open at 6:00am.

Everything’s wet of course thanks to my dicking around with my phone for an hour taking photos and uploading yesterday afternoons’ update, so I’m still just laying here in my sleeping-bag on Dardanelle’s Pass; waiting for the first walkers of the day to go by.

I only just got into my wet merino top, and fuck was that an unpleasant experience: it’s still wet now, but at least it’s body-temperature – pulling it on it felt like an ice-cold layer of dead fish and yeah, it will dry fast enough once I start climbing the staircase, if I ever get around to actually starting.

Back where it started: first place I slept the night when I first came down here for Outing #1 πŸ™‚

Here they are – first of the day – three frogs bon-jour’ing their way down the trail in their designer walking bullshit: from the “bushwalking” shoes to the “bushwalking” hat – it’s all gotta be “walking” gear designed by some designer clothing company and three times the price of non-walking/running clothes. Like ordinary clothes would be too much of an embarrassment for them πŸ™‚

God people are ridiculous.

Last update until I’ve got a power-point because my phone’s at 6%.


The library: only place you can plug shit in for hours to charge, and considering the amount of tax I paid last year you can fuck off if you think that’s a problem.

Okay I’m in town at the library and I’ve got the vaporizer, tablet and phone plugged-in to charge: the essentials.

I have to take a moment to mention that for the first time in the years I’ve been using it, I ascended the Giant Staircase in well under an hour and not once did I even feel close to breaking a sweat.

I even told tourists coming down how perplexing this is: usually it’s around 1.5 hours and kills me – I’ve gotta stop an rest every couple of flights – but fuck knows why, today it took about 40 minutes with only a few breaks of a few seconds here and there and even after I reached the top and started walking into town it took me until the Gingerbread Hut to even start “glowing”.

Fucking, I’m still gobsmacked by that.

I got drenched walking up to the cave last night, and although the cave was dry my shirt was too wet to wear and I ended-up waiting for the weather to clear without a shirt because it was warmer like that – until it suddenly wasn’t.

I’ll add the pictures in a second and I should really break this post up into multiple posts for each day because it’s already at 6586+ words and I’m not finished writing it.

I’ll also add a summary of the outing, though really the only point to note is I went down there 7 days ago heartbroken and a mess and came up feeling awesome again: the rainforest calmed me down, reorginized my attitude and healed me in one week.

Thanks for reading!

Wait, there’s more..

The day hadn’t finished when I wrote that.. I’m back at the library resuming the charging of things ..I’ll finish the update later..


I’m just laying here – in town now on a slab of concrete – in my sleeping bag when one of the neighbours across the street gets home and I hear this troll voice yell out, “WHY HI THERRRRE! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEEEEEN ALL MY LIFE!!”, and I think, ** There’s just too much fucking crazy shit goes on every day to write about it’s never ending. **

I only write about some of the crazy shit goes on in my day and there’s still never enough time to even write all that. Fuck you know and people look at me like I’m so much stranger than they are, when really they’re just wasting stupid amounts of energy trying to hide it, while I simply *accept* that with an unknown number of brain cells all glued together like cheese inside a vacumn-sealed bone vessel, random shit is just gunna happen – certainly when you have impulsive urges to just do and say things your mind whispers to you might be amusing

I know how that last paragraph sounds, and it’s not how I’m intending it to read: I’ll scrutinize the wording some other time to get it 100% succintly expressing my point, like this paragraph.

Where was I right, the library earlier this afternoon.

The Library, …again

I’m sitting on my swivel chair just waiting for my shit to charge, thinking how much I need a shave and looking at all the book-worms wasting their time coming in here when they can own whatever shit they’re reading for $2.50 from the play/apple store, forever and I’m thinking, that although I’ll have a pretty boring, hungry, shit wait until tomorrow, at least I’m here now – I don’t have to walk upstairs from Leura Forest tomorrow morning when I wake up: just walk to Coles at 6:00am.

Fuck it’s cold tonight, and the devices are completely spotted with rain that’s drizzling.

Hang on I’ll post this and re-heat myself.

No no I can feel the concrete cold through the sleeping bag. It was warmer in the rainforest pissing down rain in wet clothes. I am losing the ability to feel my fingers, noshit.

Oh and if you’ve got something to say to me, fuckin’ say it: I haven’t even been around you enough in the past few years to interpret your 10-second-stares, so i’ll just assume you were stunned into awe by my new jungle-inspired “look”.

I’m ..hang on.

7,028 words; god just let it ennnnd already.

Still the whole afternoon to go.


So I’m in the library yesterday just weighing my options when it occurs to me that although I can’t aquire money or food easily, I can get credit on a bag today, so I text my drug dealer, tell him I’ve just come up after a week in Leura Forest, have nothing but a bag will make it all more amusing regardless – then ask him when we can meet-up.

An hour or so later he replies, and tells me he wants to order a pizza under my name – all I’ve gotta do is walk down and collect it.

I tell him that’s extremely good of him to offer, but it’s too much: I mean literally too much, “I’ll be lucky to fit in two slices Dood, I’ve been on pretty much just coffee for a week straight so a whole pizza would just be wasteful”.

He concedes that’s understandable and has previously told me he’s been homeless so he gets it, then tells me that’s fine. We agree to meet before he adds that he’d like it if I’d meet him at the pizza place anyway.

I tell him a bag would be more than enough it’s payday tomorrow so there’s no need, but he insists.

** Alright, if he insists on helping: at least I know the guy – not like I’m begging for food in the street. I’ll accept his gesture of good will in good grace **

I pack-up my shit, compression-strap my increasingly heavy day-pack into the smallest possible bulk I can manage, put it on then walk out of the library heading for the main street.

I get there first, and pull-up a chair then start fucking ’round with my phone while I wait.

Minutes later he’s there carrying a little red net bag with several oranges and one of those tins that have the long tube wafers in them, then pulls a red flask out of his backpack and gives it to me; there’s tea in there, he tells me, I didn’t have any coffee but it’s hot and has sugar.

I thank him again and then spin the top cover off and pour a little cup of tea for myself. He tells me he knows how it is, and that he’ll be back in a minute he’s just gotta go down the road to get something.

I watch him walk off and drink my tea, feeling a little strange to be drinking hot tea from a flask in the main street, but it’s hot and sweet and tastes good so I go and pour another little cup whole I eye the tin for a few seconds before opening it; better to see what’s in anything while the gift-giver is not with you – we’re all like that I’m sure.

Inside the tin is a paper bag, and inside the paper bag is this..

There were actually half a dozen smokes in there but I got some out before taking this photo.

Few minutes later he’s back with these..

I know right? ..hot chips AND a hot drink.

Then we talk a bit about existential stuff and him being a bit anti-socially inclined like myself we agree on how shit the concept of ‘The Jones’s’ is, how every idiot with half a brain wastes the little brain cells granted to then freaking-out because they’ve got themselves obsessed with the social-status anxiety they’ve spent their life spinning-out about. We also seemed of the same mind in that we both admit we could be better people, but are more concerned with our own version of that – whether I think myself a good, decent and well-rounded human-being – than the bullshit everyone else thinks we have to do to “self-improve”.

Ascending to new heights of personal expansion or growth is *pointless* if the only yard-stick you’re using is the generic average of social values every other amoral arsehole considers ‘good’ – I mean have a fucking look at the world we live in! You wanna base your moral code on the sleazy majority? The average joe who leaves his woman in bed alone while he sits in the dark hunched over his computer stroking his own dick to what society now calls a “porn addiction”? Please, no really: society throws standards and morals in the bin just to SELL shit, and anyone who thinks they’ve got it right trying to fit-in with the sea of cockheads comprising the social ‘norm’ we’ve stooped to in this day and age are dumb as cockroaches.

Sorry I’m ranting, but hypocrisy and weak minded people give me the shits; and I’m not even vaguely religious; I just hate cheap and sleazy – in any aspect of life.

ONE DAY one been in town and listen to me on again already about what a commercial shithole of a world wet live in; where everything is for sale.

I tell him again I’m amazing I climbed the staircase so quickly and effortlessly this morning and he (for the second time now) tells me that’s excellent, “Well done Jason!”.

Few minutes of chatter and he takes his very expensive, Scotchguard plated coat off and gives me that too.

Very thick, very insulated, completely waterproof: you just gotta put it on to feel the thickness and weight. Took me about 1 minute – wearing it while walking back to the cultural centre – to start sweating all over, and this morning at 4:00am while I sat in the cold waiting for daylight, I might’s well have been wrapped in a blanket or doona.

I’m not quite finished with this post yet, but I’m tired and about to have a break – I’ll finish it then smooth it out later.

Before I go though..

As if he hadn’t already given me enough, he gives me this as a 50: all that floury looking stuff is resin glands that have been knocked lose in the grinder and take forever to build-up in the catcher.

To make hash you simply take those resin glands, compress them into a flat play-doh like mass, bake the shit in any oven at around 140oC for approximately twenty minutes and let it cool: that’s all hash is, and he’s given me a little tub half full of the shit free with the already outstanding buds.

Just look at it all.. I could half-fill a salt shaker and sprinkle the shit on my dinner each day for a week. Course that would be the least efficient method of ingestion.. so no, but still very nice of him.

What a legend. No really, I’ll write that in a way that conveys my appreciation a bit better later when I finish the post.




Even in town I don’t like eating alone.

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