Time to get MOVING again! ❄

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Monday, 1 April 2019

I love the coloured categories, I must say 🙂

Gives me a very easy way of themeing each post to give it a visual identifier, since I’ve been using those categories forever now but they don’t mean anything when they’re just a tiny text link at the top of the post – now I can *visually* express a posts content type and feel so it’s instantly recognizable, and we all work better with visual cues, everyone knows that.

Though I still haven’t found the selector for the text in each listing entry, and I at *least* want to change the a.* tag so the link colours can be changed too, I still haven’t successfully located that yet. but even until I find it – and unlike that perfect egg on toast the other night – I get to share changes here, since it will improve everyones’ ability to navigate posts, which will make for a smoother interaction with the site.

Once I’ve sorted out the fonts and font colours I can add the theme to posts themselves and have them match the homepage listing, but I’ve gotta finish that first.

And a theme for /hate/ in black, though there’s not many posts in hate, surprisingly.

Tuesday, 2nd April 2018

Alright I’ll be changing styles this month since half of last month’s post was labeled “classic” by the new editor and near impossible to manipulate one I’d imported the post.

2:01 PM

I’m still not .. I am trying to get my head around the organization of some of the categories – specifically /love/ at the moment – because although some are simply all-in-one subjects: /hate/ is hate and anything I immensely dislike can go in there; whatever the subject or type of hate it is, everything goes in the same place.

Love though, contains different types – romantic, animals, platonic – and though one category isn’t enough, having three or more versions is needlessly convoluted.

Wednesday, 3 April 2019

I’m going to make a concerted effort to be at least a slightly better person, since I’ve never really bothered with that before.

Thursday, 4th April 2019

Now I’ve slept on it, who am I kidding – I’m already a pretty decent person: I’ve never been slutty, I don’t steal or rip people off, I help small animals any chance I get, am not greedy and have a razor-sharp immovable sense of right or wrong.

The fact I don’t spend my life pretending to care about people/things/shit I don’t care about just reiterates honesty as another potent addition to my list of virtues and acting as though I do care about things I don’t give a shit about would only be fake currently, while ‘reprogramming’ myself to care about things I don’t give a shit about would be a waste of time anyway, because hating things that’re wrong is the right reaction to have – and always will be.

Just because some colour-blind visual defective says the sky looks green doesn’t make the sky green: it’s always been blue and will remain that colour.

The defective is wrong, and if it ever came down to a critical decision where choosing the right colour meant life or death, that person would very quickly see how epic- dangerous being colourblind potentially is, though completely an aside.

Right it’s right and wrong is wrong.

I’ve a very astute ability to call judgement on both and don’t need to be kind or nice to someone who is wrong simply to make them feel better about them being wrong – that’s for other idiots: there’s no shortage of cool-aid-drinking sheep to mill around, drinking cool aid while telling each other what great sheep they are.

At least most of the wrongs I commit affe usually upon myself and not other people.

$7 got a bag of undersized potatoes! That’s fuckin’ robbery..

12:58 PM

Still, I try different snippets of CSS for those title colours; still they remain green!

Something very sad is about to happen – a dog is about to be put down – but remember if something is the only option at the time then there’s no reason to beat yourself up about it: you’re making the best choice of a short-list of 3 equally unpleasant choices and I’m sure you’ve thought about it quite a while.

You’ll regret doing it of course and that’ll make that whole loss-grief effect amplified because you’ll be grieving a loss you yourself just caused, but you’ll be out of that soon enough and relieved to no longer have to worry about him causing you aggression-related stress and anxiety.

It’s not the right thing to do, but if it’s the only thing to do then right and wrong don’t apply, so don’t feel guity about it: you’ll feel bad enough, soon enough just missing the dog, like any normal person would 😕

Man, that Aldi sleeping-bag onesy.. I could get around my unit in one of those all winter quite comfortably.Maybe take it off while I’m using the stove..

That new X-Filesy series Project Blue Book is on again tonight at 8:30 – a double episode – in case a bit of atmospheric TV will distract you a bit for a while x

Time to go chop those gold-plated spuds and get them cooking.

7:28 PM

Potatoes are done, just gotta slop a gravy together, but I wish I’d baked bread today. The new X-Filesy show is boring me tonight anyway..

Usually I’d make the gravy adding milk to the gravy base, but I’m going to try it with just water tonight see what that translates to: it’s still got oil, browning sauce, salt and flour in it, so the flavour shouldn’t be much different but the gravy will be more clearer rather than white-washed, so really it’s mostly for appearance.

See there: fresh buttered bread that potato and gravy needs.. that’d still be vegetarian even with the bread and butter.

Friday, 5th April 2019

It’s been an aweful long time since I’ve bought real coffee you know: with budget constraints the way they’ve been and the ease of instant coffee that’s all I’ve been drinking, along with tea when the coffee runs out but the difference in caffeine levels is noteworthy.

I also signed-up for volunteering with landcare or a similar charity because I was forced, but additionally told the sucker I’d do another one of their shitty jobskills course run there in the office.

I’ve also told them all – repeatedly – that I could do their job blindfolded with just a mobile phone and one free hand, and yesterday was no different.

None of them can dispute my assertion because outside of a quick refresher course on Microsoft Office and whatever software they use to interface with centrelink I could very easily sit in an office fucking around with appointments and a computer all day.

I forgot to tell him I wanted to start on aquiring formal web development qualifications too but he’s a desk-bitch and would’ve just told me to get on TAFE’s site and apply, because they don’t work with TAFE at all.

I could easily be a desk-bitch, though checking out everyone in that office they’re always very doughy so I’d spend my income on drugs opposed to food, to stop me ending-up looking like a loaf of bread with hair like everyone else, you undersand.

7:22 PM

I’ve not finished with todays update, though I’ve become distracted again by the interface, specifically the fonts tonight: I’ve gotta pick different fonts so the 6 different styles of headings work together and maybe get rid of the colours so everything’s monochromatic grey-scale to give any upcoming style changes more pop on highlights.

Last night before bed I finally found the CSS selectors for the text within each post in the archive pages too, and near on pissed myself with excitment at the time though that’s yesterdays’ breakthrough so I’m over that now.

What I’m not over, is the way visually styling each category creates an entirely new layer to the layout and interactability of the site: makes a huge difference compared to the flat, boring list I had before 🙂

Night Lurkers!


I’ve gotta go to bed in a minute, but I’ve been editing older posts and see most or all the photos are gone from all the posts. I’ve still got all those photos on this phone, but don’t remember where exactly they all went, so I’ll have to read through previous posts and just re-upload whichever photos fit, because the posts are missing a lot without those images to illustrate things.

Saturday, 6th April 2019

I’ve slept-in again fuckit.. gotta be up at 7am on Monday, I didn’t want to sleep this late mm.. oh well.

4:35 PM

So many photos to re-insert ..

8:28 PM

Right, so I’ve been through and re-added the photos in one post but I dunno.. take a lot of patience to do all the posts.. especially the ones with dozens of images mm..

There’s bread rising, even though it’s too late to be baking: I want eggs and toast for dinner so baking’s gotta happen.

Certainly worked-out to be good value, that bag of flour.

Sunday, 7th April 2019

I’ve got to be at their office eleven hours from now, so no staying up until 5:00 AM for me tonight.

Monday, 8th April 2019

7:03 AM

That pain in the arse course starts today, and a knew I shouldn’t have demanded to be signed-up for it on the spot because I really can’t be arsed getting up at this time to go and sit in at office unpaid all day every day for three cocksucking weeks.

Seemed like a good idea when I was there the other day.

One more demonstration – or lesson – of why acting on an emotional impulse is bad.

For a moment there too, when I woke up and grabbed my phone I thought it said 11:30 AM and too late to worry about going in today. Then saw what time it actually was.

Cunt of an alarm.

Anyway I know I won’t mind when I get there – for the first hour at least – since I’ll have half a roomful of people to amuse myself with, but I’ll be bored by lunch so I’ll have to take a battery pack to keep the phone charged so I can rudely play with it to demonstrate how bored I am.

10:14 AM

The trainer has just come back from a forty minute phone call which was pretty unprofessional and I told him that after he’d apologized to everyone and he apologized a second time, but it gave us smokers plenty of time outside.

As he asked around the room what everyone’s life goals were, some said they wanted full time work, some farted on about getting rich quickly and several single mothers in the group currently had no greater goal than “survival” – how touching.

When my turn came around my answer was to find my soulmate and get it on with her.

‘No other goals?’

“Sure, but that’s the most important.”

‘What about the job?’

“A job I actually *like* doing, yes that, but everything else is superfluous compared to locating your life-partner and partnering with them and everything is easier when you’ve got someone other than yourself to do it for.”

One of the single mothers is delving into an extended boohoo about how hard life is as a single mother.

I’ve all four of those virtues in perfect working order.

11:37 AM

Someone better do something that sparks the atmosphere soon: I’m already bored shitless and can’t write anything amusing with a group of people who give me nothing to work with.

1:45 PM

Everybody’s bored, everybody’s falling asleep ar their desks and everyone’s ready to leave but we are nearly through the first day!

There was an exercise before lunch that saw everyone answering questions from a handout about the difference between collaboration and co-operation, with everyone meant to give 5 examples of each.

I suggested we could save everyone twenty minutes and go to lunch twenty minutes early by simply explaining the dictionary definition of the two words, since that’s just basic language skills everyone should have anyway and we don’t need four pages of examples and filler about what boils-down to just two words.

I also opined that anybody not already familiar with the meaning of either word is unlikely to use them in the future anyway, to which the trainer agreed, but opined himself that not everybody knows, so we’ll do the exercise anyway.

He then asked everyone to be as honest as possible and candid in telling him what they think of the course as it progresses so I told him that the fundamental problem with all these courses is they’re just too boring to keep anyone engaged and held up the 31-page booklet he’d given everyone – citing that as just one of the problems,

“We spend half our lives glued to mobile devices reading online content that’s bright, colourful and fully interactive.”

“A stack of paper with black and white print on every page bores everyone stupid.”

“Doesn’t matter how good or bad the training material might be if nobody wants to engage a stack of paper full of black print, which nobody does anymore. “

4:16 PM

I survived the boring and am back at home.

Though I meant to get milk and tally-hos while I was at Woolies, I completely forgot and don’t mind particularly: I’ll have to go to bed early tonight so there’s no need for much more coffee, and I’ve got my pipe in place of papers so that’s all cooleroo.

This block system in the new wordpress editor really does make life much easier.

Tuesday, 9th April 2019

Yes, I am running late today, but only slightly.

9:19 AM

I managed to find the only halfway interesting thing in the entire booklet! .. that’d be me in the middle – the smiley one surrounded by unhappy dullards 🙂

We’re meant to be doing some kind of exercise but I’ve absolutely no fuckin’ idea at all what’s going on.

Something to do with compiling a stack of papers with our resume, a chosen employer and their company policy or vision or whatever but there’s meant to be more than that, though nobody gives a shit – it’ll all go in the recycling bin before it’s used for anything useful anyhoo.

12:00 PM

*yawn* ..

The trainer has two cats, so I’ve scribbled-up this to illustrate how the class feels about another afternoon of repetitive, boring handouts.

Everyone loves it of course, even half finished so I’ve given it to the most attractive desk-chick to file as feedback, though she won’t be changing the method of content delivery based on my cat she tells me because giving everyone an ipad would cost too much 🙁

Fuck! I just found two pairs of already clean socks: washed and pushed into balls … just wow!

God I love having my own site.

The only thing I wish I could change is how many times I have to tap the Update button in the course of editing on an average day.

I already know how it could be fixed, but Automattic – the developers of WordPress – would need to add an option for “live editing”, where a constant connection I’d kept alive and every keystroke is added to the database as you type – just as if you’d clicked Update ahh, automatically.

The inherent problem with such an editor would be that if you did something stupid like accidentally bump DELETE after a Select-All, it would all instantly have been already changed in the database and would be gone forever, but this could be prevented by having a “Commit Revision” button since there’s already Undo and Redo.

Tell you what, I’ve become very good at slapping together a quick, smooth, tasty gravy and I’ll sleep well again tonight considering how tired I am already.

Two days now of having to actually sit upright for 7 hours and occasionally walk around – fuckin’ wearing me out, that shit is! 😴

Wednesday, 10th April 2019

Straight in the door at quarter-past nine and this dickhead’s already given everyone an “assessment” to do.

Of course I need to quote the word ‘assessment’ so there’s no mistake that this isn’t really an assessment at all, but an ‘open-book’ time-filler that’s never going to be used for any grading or assessment purposes – there’s no statement or certificate whatsoever upon completion of this 3-week course, so no assessments are even utilized.

Like almost all the other material so far, it’s simply a handout designed to keep the class busy wasting time, because the trainer has no fucking idea at all how to relate to the roomful of unemployed he’s sitting with and we all know that, so all his banter about where to find a decent place for his $25 tax-deductible lunches just make him look like a fat, jolly wanker to everybody here.

There actually: I’ve left the course to go and have centrelink move my payday to tomorrow, to which he replied “that’s what lunch is for”, ..to which I replied that I don’t need permission to go see centrelink and left.

By yesterday the entire class had already decided the trainer was a bit of a wanker.. hang on, gotta go outside while I’m waiting for the trainer himself to stop looking at cat videos – most of the class have already finished and I completed all six in the booklet a while ago.

Centrelink is sorted anyhoo, and half the people back at the office are about to lose their shit: we spend every smoke break outside bitching about what a farce the whole thing is and how uninspiring the trainer delivering that training is.

1:37 PM

I’ve decided I will privatize my rants too, either today or – more likely – tomorrow: nobody would even want to read past the first bitch-fest, so there’s no point giving the site address to anyone until it’s been mm ‘smoothed out’.

Few hours, I can have all the bad copy/pasted into new posts, thus making myself appear to be a much calmer human, so we’ll do that. Maybe set /rants/ to members only so anyone wants to view my less fluffy thoughts just has to be logged-in.

4:13 PM

Okay okay goodness we had a breakthrough this afternoon, with the boredom shoved out the room for a while while we sorted an issue with our tutor, who we managed to piss off enough so he turned-out to be the one nearly lost his shit 🙂

Hold on, I’ve gotta save this and change browsers: although the site *looks* best using Firefox, Firefox has a bug that prevents double-tapping to select text that means no matter how many times I double-tap the text I want to select no text is selected.

We had another practice exercise this afternoon, and while we’ve all just shuddup and quietly completed these obviously stupid exercises the past three days, today we didn’t.

Actually, the first exercise was a fabricated scenario whereby we were managers who had received what the training manual tried to coin “negative constructive criticism”, which is so obviously one word too many for any term that’s meant to look authorative, like it was created by people who actually educate people: criticism in and of itself is the dictionary definition of negative feedback – what kind of training company would create terminology so illiterate?

Anyway, the second exercise was another fabricated managerial scenario where we had to list 10 attitudes we’d foster in our workplace to foster a healthy, happy workplace for employees.

The answers to that question are so mundane and universally agreed upon these days that all these exercises are fuckin’ primary school shit, so rather than list the usuals, respect, common courtesy, inclusion, empathy – our group wrote the opposite: sexual harrassment, criticise team-members, be aggressive and rude, insensitive and instead of resolving issues with co-workers just beat the shit out of each other.

The rest of the class heard us discussing these options and so when it came time to read our list to the class, the trainer chose our group and asked us if we were ready.

“We’re ready!”

‘Okay great.’

“We’re ALL-OVER it!”

‘You’ve been over it since Monday though’

So I start reading our list out to everyone.

Start to read it and got about halfway through the list when the trainer’s stopped me to say that if I want to muck around and treat the whole thing like one big joke then maybe I’d best not contribute until I do.

“I’m just reading for the group dood.”

‘Yeah and I know it’s just in fun and all that but if you’re bla bluh bla bla blaaaaah, then why blah bla blah.’ and at this point someone else in my group interjected to say the proper answers are pretty much obvious to everyone, which they were, and that everyone already knows them, which they do.

Wait, I’m hungry – I have to cook something and eat it.

Thursday, 11th April 2019

Sorry, I fell asleep shortly after eating last night I’ll finish yesterday’s entry today, right after I get to the shops.

9:07 AM

And we’re in class: here, we, go 🙂

Our inept tutor has decided we can all sit somewhere different today – no doubt thinking that’ll change the dynamic 😉

He’s pulled someone aside this morning after everyone else left for their break, to .. hang on, the blow-hard is droning-on about shit we’re reading from the book again.

Man this is boring..

12:54 PM

I just hit this fly as it flew past and knocked it out of the air: for *once* there were actually people who saw it happen! Fucking, awesome. 😎

Almost done with another cookie-cutter day of dross, and for some reason the tutor has eased-up on his wanking-on about people taking the piss and not giving a shit: gives me the impression he’s maybe been told that the whole class hates his guts and that persisting with his faux-authoritarian act will only negatively affect him at this point, since none of us even need to give a fuck: we’re only obliged to attend the course not collectively pretend-like we’re happy with the most inept tutor anyone’s ever had: everyone’s tired of his droning voice because for four days now, literally all he’s done is sit on his arse reading out loud from a training manual, stop here and there to get everyone to discuss some passage in the book, then regale us all in yet another example about himself and his exciting life as a gay north shore cockswab with two cats.

The tutor himself is as dull as the textbook he spends all day inaccurately reading from: he gets pissy when the class isn’t acting interested while perfectly ignorant to the possibility he’s just bad at his job: we can’t remain interested in terrible course material delivered terribly by a terrible teacher – it’s just not humanly possible.

The entire class has thought this for days now.

Anyhoo, here’s our doodle-of-the-day: a snake..

I’ll edit today’s text when I get home: doesn’t read at all well when I’m distracted as I’m writing all day.

4:16 PM

You know, I feel so good I’ve had a hard-on for half an hour now and it still hard as a rock anytime I grope myself, and this is only my forth day of leaving the house again!

I’m home now. Home and stoned and dinner is very much organized..

I’ve got other things for dinner, but these are looking like a serious option and that seriousness deepens with every cone I smoke 🙃

I gave the site URL to one of the doods I know from the church too, and he’s a heavy reader of books, so he’ll probably garner some amusement from the site – being familiar with the locations and people and stories I’ve written.

I also bought both bread and fresh milk before coming home because I can’t be fucked baking a loaf today, but I did have the foresight to purchase a non-stick, proper bread tin at well.

I’ve used these pans in Adelaide, where I actually sold a few loaves of bread: whichever recipe I used for that, I managed to make bread good enough that people at Michele’s office paid $5/loaf for a brief period, but only two people because I only baked two loaves of bread a day so it was destined to be more trouble than it was worth in the end, and I used two of the above bread pan to cook them.

Great non-stick, the bread just falls out when it’s cooked with no sticking at all and the thick rim around the top adds a nice muffin-top shape to the resulting loaf.

Though $9 for a brand new bread pan may appear an unnecessary kitchen upgrade, remember baking my own bread will again be very necessary once my money is gone which will happen within a week like it always does and I want square bread that fits in a toaster.

Oh, the ice-cream is excellent 😛

The ice-cream has stopped being excellent after 3 bowls, actually I feel a bit sick 🤢

8:43 PM

Alright the ice-cream nausea has passed enough for me to have something .. not ice-cream and the socks, shirt and underwear are washed and drying on furniture,

Hand-washing clothes really isn’t hard at all, and though I’d never want to do a full washing-machine load by hand I don’t need to: two shirts, a few pairs of underwear and a pair of socks is all I usually wash, which isn’t even enough for a machine anyway.

Friday, 12th April 2019

Though the classes resentment levels have not lowered, we’ve worn ourselves out being smartarses all week so nobody’s snappy today: just groaning the day away, we are.

The survey form of the week.

I’m going to suggest they hire me as a consultant to help them the training in a direction where everybody doesn’t hate the courses.

We’re going early today so only another two hours and it’s a good solid weekend of grunting at the TV like a slob for me.

12:11 PM

Our trainer has had himself a sudden moment of strategic clarity, and just out-of-the-blue starts talking to me to say that although he doesn’t want to put me on the spot or embarrass me, “You’re obviously extremely intelligent.”.

“Oh right, yeah I know. Ahh, thank you.”

Smart move jelly-bean, appealing to my vanity – had he done that 5 days ago he’d have had a much more compliant class 😏

What else do I need from the shop before I go today.

I sure as shit don’t want to walk back into town tomorrow for something I simply forgot about now mm.

Sugar, and I’ve got it.

1:58 PM

For afternoon tea, most attractive desk-chick brought two plates of these out. No no I’m not implying there’s anything special about them or that she’d brought them around because she’s secretly in-love with me or anything as presumptuous as that, I just took a muffin and decided to add it to the post – why not right – it’s immeasurably more exciting than the lesson going on around it.

I didn’t even feel like cake and though I didn’t eat any at the time I brought two muffins home in a bag, so I can eat them later when I’m watching The Office re-runs stoned and feel like something I don’t usually have in my possession because I just don’t like cake that much.

I like really nice, freshly home-baked cakes with cream-cheese icing and real fresh whipped cream, but not rubbish sold in any shop. Even the so-sought-after Hominy Bakery cakes – though they’re much better than supermarket shit – are still just cold, old cake cooked the day before and the thought of actually buying any kind of cake while I’m in town literally does not enter my mind – ever – because cake just isn’t the kind of food I’m into I guess.

Wait! I just remembered I’ve got ice-cream: ice-cream makes even shit cake taste good! 😎

The tutor is gone from the course: not through our collective discontent (though all the staff at WISE were there to clearly hear all our complaints and issues live as they happened since it’s only a small open-plan office and everybody is on the same side of the room), but because he was only there for the first week, with some other trainers from some marketing place starting monday for the remaining two weeks.

He was fucking useless though, and I openly said that for everyone to hear a dozen times or more this week, because he’s ill-suited for the job he’s doing, has all the likability of a cane toad and he’s utterly useless at actually teaching, with today making 5 days straight of him literally just sitting on his arse reading a book to the class and having us do the most mind-numbing exercises simply to fill-in time while he fucked around on his laptop or phone.

Only whatever got into our subliminal layer was learned, and I can’t tell you any of that because it’s only in my subconscious which makes it as useless as the trainer himself.

I thought I’d already added this, but I hadn’t – here’s our doodle-of-the-day..

7:27 PM

Yes yes indeed that was excellent..

Hot blueberry muffins with cookies & cream ice-cream.

Of course I oven-heated the muffins first.

Saturday, 13th April 2019

Good morning Lurkers!

I’ll update this and recap the week soon: it’s Saturday morning and I’m still caffeinating my brain awake, you understand.

Incidentally, the new hit counter I’ve added to the right filters visits by IP address so it doesn’t tick up everytime a page is viewed or refreshed and started at 60K because the last server had just over that many hits before it was relocated to here.

The gaudy red LED digits remind me of that time in the 80s when digital alarm clock radios were the highest expression of slick, polished technology we had in our homes: state-of-the-art, they were back then, at a time when Madonna was still young and hot and didn’t have the nasty sinewy golem ‘work-out’ arms she’s got now.

Matter of fact, Madonna was hot enough back then that she was the first woman I ever masturbated over: at the kitchen table to a photo in a Woman’s Day or similar magazine and that was the first time I realized I had to keep going to ejaculate! The day I discovered how my dick works, that was 😎

But Madonna was quickly dethroned by Kylie Minogue who’s ‘I should be so lucky’ got me off for years: while most males in my age group were into anything from Playboy to hardcore porn, that one music video of Kylies’ was all I needed.

What was I, thirteen or so then and I wouldn’t get my first actual girlfriend until the night of my 17th birthday (in a caravan with a chick called Samantha), but I stroked-it to that music video so many times the tape started wearing-out – always worn most in the hottest sections of the clip and I think Kylie Minogue was the woman who first made me prefer women with a ‘petite’ frame. A defining moment in sexual development.

Once I’d had an actual woman I pretty much instantly lost interest in magazines and started using memory of real sex I had for stimulation instead of flat pixels shaped like celebrities I’ll never meet, let alone fuck, and here we are.

Anyway I like the digital LED counter style because of that.

Speaking of blasts from the past and just when I’d thought there’d be nothing on the television to sporadically pay attention to, 2001: A Space Odyssey comes on. Four hours long and it seems to move slow enough that even I can keep track of the plot while distracted.

This is some slow shit this movie but I’ve gotta say the camerawork is very clever: they manage to convey the anti-gravity of space well enough that it’s slightly nausea-inducing to watch, even on a smaller sized TV.

The only food any of the space station crew get however, are these tiny sterile trays with a layer of what looks to be simply a smooth paste in assorted colours: just paste every day for years on end – nooo thank you.

2001 A Space Odyssey: creepy midgets in monkey suits – the “magic” of cinema 🙂

Monday, 15th April 2019

There wasn’t any reason to write anything yesterday so I let my brain switch-off for the day.

We’ve got two chicks for the marketing part of the course, which will make it more difficult to be malcontented since they’re attractive enough for me to lean more towards being cow-eyed than bored, but we’ve only been here 7 minutes so far, plenty of time left to get annoyed yet and I’ve already told them we like our breaks and hated last week’s trainer.

10:09 AM

Most attractive desk-chick has just distributed a few of these, which several of us eyed with the kind of dead-pan expression a pack like that deserves, given we’ve all managed to rock-up showered and clean.

All of us except Justin, who always smells like cheap supermarket spray-cans.

3:42 PM

As I surmised quickly this morning, the two new trainers we’ve got for the next two weeks are too nice, young and relaxed for any of us to take exception and nobody in the room had any issues all day really.

Helps that both the chicks are smokers themselves and don’t try to force us to sit through the boredom all day.

Nonetheless, the blonde chick butchered my resume down to one page, which was fine until I read it and found several details copy/pasted from the wrong section plus my old email address and phone number.

4:29 PM

Gotta say, I do like most attractive desk chick.

A diminutive five feet tall with piercing light green eyes that pin your focus to her and have that unmistakable glint of intelligence, yeah I’ll get back to my admiration of the woman later.

No yeah, not bad at all.

7:01 PM

One of the doods at the office was complaining today about how he can’t even keep his clothes clean while unemployed, because the laundromat is too expensive!

I told him I wash everything in my bathroom sink, because I still don’t heave a washing machine and “I don’t really care either.” and there’s the reason above: clean pants, underwear, shirt and socks for tomorrow – they’ll be dry in another hour anyth the heater on too – fresh out the sink and wrung-out for tomorrow.

Took me not even 15 minutes of squidging around in the water with a very nice smelling soap I also shower with. I dunno why any single male living alone would want a washing machine – let alone use one as an excuse to not wash their clothes – but there you go.

Anyway I’m going to the bathroom sink again, to exfoliate my face this time and really it needs it – I’ve got little dry bits of skin here and there and haven’t had the automatic exfoliation that goes with a razor since Christmas.

Christmas is about when I bought the electric beard trimmer and though it’s a lot less hassle to use than an actual razor it doesn’t shave-off the layer of dead skin as it shaves-off the stubble, so I’m going to do it manually..


8:05 PM

What can I have for dinner.. there’s plenty of choices, but I don’t know which I want enough to get up and go cook mm.

Beans & Toast, I had and then remembered I had a tub of nice mango yogurt, and Whittakers’ chocolate AND ice-cream..

Tuesday, 16th April 2019

Good morning Lurkers.

This morning, we’re doing the same thing we did yesterday, with the same handout and the same seating and the same non-accomplishment kinda vibe.

But that’s alright when we’re not expected to sit silently for hours on end and the two chicks don’t care if or when we go outside.

I could go up the street and order myself breakfast and nobody would bitch at me when I get back.

This is the same handout we were given yesterday morning and I’ve drawn another dog on the back of my sheet..

Hang on, …my brain needs to wake-up some before I’ll have anything to say so pft-pft.. be gone with you Lurkers go eat breakfast or whatever.

I’ve decided to create a new theme so there’s at least a choice: now battery-life isn’t so critical – I’m no longer either homeless or living like a feral in the bush – there’s no reason I have to be bound to the dark theme, and a lighter coloured counter-theme would be a nice change and allow me to switch back and forth depending on my overall state of mind at the time.

Two additional themes would be ideal, then I’d have dark, medium and light to match any elevation or depression in mood.

11:21 AM

The fat blonde chick with the bland, featureless face has started bitching at me about not ‘taking it seriously’ .. here we go.

1:00 PM

Man fuckin’ WOW!

I just spent my entire lunch test-driving this powered scooter..

Easily does 40km/hour and feels extremely dangerous, it beats the shit out of using my legs and a full charge takes about 5 hours and gets you 50km worth of that.

Best of all, the asking price for such a death-trap is only about $1000 brand new!

I’ve got no choice now but to get another job so I can buy one.

2:39 PM

Home and hosed: I’ve got an interview tomorrow for a job I would immeasurably prefer to cleaning, right here in town.

A nearly full-time maintenance job.

With NO scrubbing dried shit off toilet bowls, NO mopping stale piss of floors, no filthy strangers bodily fluids and no bins to change, I’ve spent almost a decade being the home maintenance guy where I lived and am very comfortable with all aspects of dumbshit handyman operations and though any halfwit with a half a brain can be a fine handyman, the work is at least more varied than bins/flooring/toilets and twice as dignified.

So tomorrow morning I’ll go in fully pumped on caffeine and tell them I am the perfect fit for their job.

4:47 PM

Fuck that scooter – I have got to get myself one of those..

What do I have to do tonight: wash my best-fitting shirt for tomorrow; re-format my resume from the ugly heap of shit that blonde bitch turned it into back to something doesn’t hurt your eyes to look at – Times New Roman font she used for fucksake! Bitch is trying to make it look so bad nobody can read it!; update this; start on the alternate ‘light’ theme; mmm eat; that’s it.. the only things I *must* do are wash my best-fitting shirt for tommorrow; update here and eat.

The shirt’s already soaking, so I’ll start on the new theme first.

I’ll start with a copy/paste of the psychaeslthetic-dark them then make changes to that, so the colours might look retty fucky once I start and there are over 100 individual selectors to choose new colours for, so it might take a while. Actually I’ll use Adobe Color to decide on a colour scheme since that chooses alternate colours for me based on what is already proven to be most pleasing to the human eye.

So I only need pick a single primary theme colour.

I am very nicely baked, and extra relaxed this evening.

Speaking of which I almost applied for a job at the Fairmont resort earlier today, but after the two marketing chicks asked whether I had any criminal charges or record and I answered no – and that I’ve got my police clearance and WWC clearance – one of them asked if I’d pass a drug test.

Course I told them I probably would and they said I can’t really ‘probably’ pass since it’s either positive or negative so I told them if it were a test for bad drugs I’d pass but if it were a test for THC, I would probably fail.

Oh and for a change since most my photos have been indoors lately, here’s a small cricket or grasshopper or similar whose movement in the dirt caught my attention. I think it’s back legs are missing though, because it never jumped..

Yeah obviously no hind legs now I look at the photo and no doubt the reason it was kicking around like a spastic enough to catch my eye.

I put him under the base of the plant so he wasn’t in the open, once I’d taken photos.

7:49 pm

There we go: most the major selectors are changed, though I’m not all that convinced the light-grey background isn’t just a bit too, grey mm.. I’ve gotta make bread too, because I want my own bread and it’ll get too late if I don’t start now.


And here’s tomorrow’s lunch. I’ll take some slices, then grab a banana from Woolies to mash between them..

The tin made quite a difference and there’s malt, honey, butter instead of vegetable oil plus a sprinkle of nutmeg mostly for the flecks of dark they add.

The glaze is egg-yolk with a little powdered milk for added browning as well as enough salt to give the crust itself a richer flavour than the inside of the loaf, which it has 😊

I used butter instead of oil because milk creates a finer texture, so the cream in the butter did that with more flavour as well as act as a replacement for the oil.

Turned out excellent, and warm bread with butter was all I bothered to eat for dinner.

Note my avoiding to use of the word “perfect”, given how many loaves I’ve already declared as being perfect.

Almost perfect.

Night Lurkers!

Wednesday, 17th April 2019

Mmhmm there’s a strange dynamic going on in the classroom today, specifically eminating from the two “trainers”: everyone else seems normal, except most attractive desk-chick, who had the day off – her brother died, apparently.

But the marketing chicks? How’s this for bizarre..

Yesterday I mentioned planning to apply for a maintenance job at one of the hotels in town and so this morning when I got there, the first thing I did was, re-print my original resume to revert it from the ugly mess the fat blonde made of it.

Tell a lie actually: the first thing I did upon arriving at the office was get several more coffees in me to snap my brain awake in preparation for engaging face-to-face with the hotel manager.

I told the asian trainer Gabby that was the plan, that once I’d woken my brain up I would head on over and talk to someone about the job they’ve got advertised and she’s said that’s good.

Took about an hour to become stimulated to the point I’d be mentally bouncy enough to deal with a potential employer plus talk shit with the doodbros of the class a while – to kickstart my brain into conversation-mode – after which I decided I was awake now and went to wet my hair plus hang a piss, with my huge, thick dick.

I come out the bathroom and sit down in front of Gabby to write something on the cover-page of my resume when she’s asked what the plan was.

“I’m goin’ over to give the hotel this”, I tell her, and she starts acting shocked that I’d be about to introduce myself to an employer when my hair is wet despite the fact it was flawlessly neat.

I tell her it’s wet because I just did it, but she’s got another stick in her arsenal: my hair has dripped on my shirt! *gasp*


‘So I don’t think you should go over there now, I don’t think you’re ready.’

“Mmm not ready because of wet hair and a few drops on my shirt collar? Tell ya what, it’ll be dry again in half an hour – I’ll wait until then.”

‘I just think you should wait until tomorrow.’

“Mmm, right.”

‘I don’t think you’re ready: you’re hair is wet, you’ve got drips on your shirt and you haven’t even done your buttons up. You should wait until tomorrow.’

“I disagree.”

‘Okay fine go over now. I just want you to have the best chance of getting the job and I don’t think you’ll get it if you go now.’

“I’ll have no chance at all if someone else beats me to it.”

Then she tells me she can smell smoke on me, and *that’s* the reason I should wait until tomorrow to take a few sheets of paper 20 meters up the street to notify them I would like a maintenance job.

Bitch is off her head and there’s somehting very odd about that, especially given I’d already told her what I was doing when I first walked in the door: yesterday the blonde bitch with the plain face was moo’ing about my not taking the jobsearch seriously, today I’m about to go and tell an employer they’ve got my job and she tells me not to.

The only conclusion I could arrive at is there was something I didn’t know about her motivations for trying to discourage me from applying for the job and while I don’t know what her motivations are, I really don’t need to: she’s trying to stop me applying for a job I’m perfectly able to do, when she’s paid to nag me to start applying for jobs.

I don’t even need to know *why* she’s being deceptive and sneaky, I just need to identify the fact she’s being deceptive and sneaky to know she’s doing nothing at all to benefit me.

Same with every idiot on earth trying to deceive others: whatever the specific reasons there might be driving whoever to whatever dumbshit manipulation they think might benefit them is of no interest to me at all: the fact they’re trying to manipulate you at all is what matters because once you know someone is willing to be deceptive, you know they’re untrustworthy and that’s all you need know to nail them to the outside of your trust – along with all the other sick things that relish living in the dark, sticky filth of dishonesty.

Their tiny-minded, petty reasoning and motivations always bore me to sleep no matter how clever they consider their plan to be, because the real motivation is always common, garden-variety selfishness and there’s nothing clever about that.

I’ll finish those baked beans with my almost perfect bread – while it’s still fresh: I did remember to cut a few slices to take today for lunch and had them with squashed banana from Woolies, just as planned and though it was simple, it still tasted pretty sunny – even without any butter 🙂

I’ll finish this soon, I’ve gotta eat something.

Thursday, 18th April 2019

I didn’t catch up on yesterday because Wednesday night is a good night for television, but I will since it’d be remiss of me to to not make time to write about the inappropriate touching that happened yesterday, with one of the group actually slipping in a stroke to her side: he thought nobody was looking, and Gabby jumped a foot in the air before recoiling in her chair and I called out, “Bit of sexual harassment there, fucker hasn’t even got a job yet and he’s already feeling women up.”

Deathly silence: nobody said a word and Gabby herself looked like she would’ve been quite happy for nobody to notice that sleazy moment of physical intrusion, but I continued – telling the dood next to me Gabby will need a security escort to her hotel at this rate.

Suppose I don’t need to mention it anymore since I just did, but I will note as an addendum that the first thing this dood did this morning when he got here was ask the fat blonde chick whether Gabby was here today, which she is: she’s hiding in one of the offices with the fuckin’ door closed.

Think tubby Dracula with none of the charm OR smoothness of Bram Stokers’ character.

Don’t misconstrue the above: Gabby doesn’t interest me at all but idiots who can’t keep their hands to themselves attract my attention because they’re grubs that sicken me.

10:59 AM

Who’s that sending messages to me via the site chat applet? Identify yourself.

I’ve test driven a more powerful model of scooter this morning but didn’t like the acceleration or feel of it compared to the cheaper, less powerful one.

Course there are road diggers and shit going on just outside and the fuckin thing weighs 20kg so I can’t be arsed carrying it down two flights of stairs just to take it out for a proper spin around town, which obviously reduces the levels of fun since I’m stuck in the little tiled patio area instead of zig-zagging around cars in the Woolies carpark like a proper pain in the arse to motorists.

3:10 PM

Not only have I spent the day properly updating my resume and uploaded it to the site, I’ve spent all day completely disregarding both the fat marketing cows and their mooing: no matter how many times they asked me what I was doing, I had a smart-arse reply: most attractive desk chick is not only more useful, she’s the manager so I simply told her what I was doing and dismissed the two bitches requests completely.

If I’d listened to them I’d be too busy panicking about which shirt to wear to actually hand-out my resume to local businesses like I did yesterday.

They’re completely inactive: like two doughy loaves of half-cooked bread with heads for eating and fingers for typing.

Fortunately we’re done for another week and with the Easter long weekend I have four days of being less bored at home than I am listening to the muffled tapping of chubby fingers on laptop keyboards – literally all they do all day.

8:38 PM

Queen Victoria, now *there* was a woman and a half: formidable, devoted to her man even forty years after his death and regarded motherhood as the auxillary matter of reproduction it was – just a tiny part of the overall, not an entire lifestyle.

Oooo now it’s a show about the tower of london. Apparently visitors used to bring pets to feed to the animals in the menagerie – just for the spectacle 🙂

Friday, 19th April 2019

Good Friday didn’t start very good, with another two calls in a row from an unknown number that could’ve been an employer and my phone telling me it had insufficient funds to call or text back.

Same number called two consecutive times yesterday morning and although I get a lot of spam calls they usually happen in the afternoon: this was two calls in a row, two days in a row at around 9:30 am after handing copies of my resume to over half a dozen local businesses, so it seems more likely an employer than spam, yet I can’t call back to find out.

I’ve still got data though so I’m not completely out of credit and sent a test-message to Woman #6 which went through fine, and she’s replied that most employers wouldn’t ring on a public holiday which sounds right for office-type employers but this whole town makes it’s living from tourists and holiday periods invariably see Katoomba packed with rich arseholes throwing cash around: the places I left my resume at were all hotels, motels and cafes so they’ll be open and very busy all easter.

I should thank Woman #6 while I’m here for opening my attitude to the idea of using words to express myself actually: she loves words, and even published a book of her own poetry while I was there which I was never interested in – even with at least one of the poems (“Weeds”) written about me – plus a second book after I’d left and moved here to the mountains.

Before I met Michele, I’d never given two thoughts to writing anything and even the five years I was with her I austracized her constantly for being a word-nerd: I’d lose it and tell her to shuddup because she’d obsessively correct the grammar in everything I said and tell her the only reason she was so into language was she couldnt paint or play an instrument for shit, but I was wrong: linguistics are not the last mode of expression for the ungifted, they’re the mode of expression of more complicated thoughts than can ever be expressed with flat images or the abbreviated english goes with the immature doof-doof and jingling comprising most songs.

Painting and music are the inferior method of expression as it turns out, and while any halfwit with a good eye or ear can produce something pleasing to the eye or ear, intelligence is required to arrange a group of words in a way that other people can simultaeneously visualize, emotionally relate to and understand and intelligence is required to read and absorb it.

On a concious level I still didn’t give a shit about writing, but subconsciously something was obviously going on and I kept the Rainforest Journals primarily to let her see what life in a tent living like a feral was like, but also to show her I was having a fine time without her.

Course I wasn’t having a fine time at all the first few months stuck in a strange town with nobody, nothing but a backpack and a seamingly dumb plan to live with animals in a national park, but I figured that out and here we are: the more I wrote, the more I realized that you can paint a much clearer picture in peoples minds with a flourish of text than you ever could with a painting or drawing or even music.

The more I realized how well I could express myself, the more practiced I got and the better I became at using plain english to convey a message or situation: Michele was the one who made me realize that as boring as they might look, words are far and away the superior vehicle for ideas, thoughts and emotions.

Course she does write press releases for a living and wouldn’t do that if she wasn’t so smitten with the printed word.

Not everything I write makes for exciting or even engaging reading, but the more practiced you are the more succintly you can express the full spectrum of your own perspective in a much broader array of contexts, so while I might be at home today simply meditating on a given subject I can hone my writing and tighten the bolts to deliver a passage of text that will cut someone in half or make their day or even make a woman wet, because I have the skillset to do it.

Nobody’s getting cut lately of course because I have no major issues with anyone: though calling a few trainers fat wankers might give the air of a person who has major issues with many people, 99% of them are unimportant to me – demonstrated by the fact I’ve only spat out a few cheap, mindless invectives instead of going to the trouble of creating concisely worded insults for them.

My point, anyway, is that sometimes I’m just allowing my thoughts to float around and writing them as they stream out rather than edit them down to a slick, polished point.

7:30 PM

Dried anchovies, which must be the same thing Whiskas use in their dried cat snacks, because they look the same and smell like stale piss when dry.

Options for dinner tonight are a bit limited since I’m a bit over potatoes, gravy, bread and sausages nor feel like weet-bix as a meal so I’m having noodles with garlic, those anchovies cooked, oyster sauce and rice bran oil.

The cat-snack dried fish are actually very nice once they’ve been boiled and rinsed plus – at over 50% – they’re higher in protein than any raw food ingredient I’ve ever seen.

Some fresh spring onion tossed through after everything’s cooked would be the only thing I wish I had to add to the dish actually.

Killing Eve is on at 8:30 tonight too, so a weird noodle dish will go well with the ever cosmopolitan show and the outstanding Villianelle: the perfect antagonist played by the hottest actress on television at the moment – Jodie Comer – who also played Ivy Moxon in Thirteen a few years ago.

Mercurial indeed, sort of actress you cannot force yourself to take your eyes off anytime she’s in frame.

The protagonist – Eve – is asian and mostly amusing but hideous and you can call me superficial all you like: she’s got a face like a mashed-up pie and I’m the one telling the story here, so I’ll judge and evaluate female beauty or lack of it all I like.

Rather than oinking and mooing about what a sexist pig you think I am with your socially-dependent lefty-sheep brain, just be grateful you don’t have a face that bad and I never said she wasn’t a nice person or intelligent or a good actress – just that she is extremely unfortunate looking, which in itself is another stark contrast between Villianelle and Eve.

Tuesday, 23rd April 2019

This is the first of the last three days of this course, and it couldn’t end fast enough for most of us.

End of last week, the two bitches started winding several of us up because we can’t take the shit seriously, which is a pretty stupid approach given we were already scoffing at them to begin with and if they keep winding me up personally I’ll reduce myself to personally insulting them: I’ve got a long running on/off woman who does a fine job driving me insane – that role’s already filled.

Nothing so far, but those of us who aren’t fans brought our bad-attitudes with us so it won’t take much.

You didn’t tell me why you removed the greyhound sticker from the car, mm?

9:46 AM

Not even an hour in I’m falling asleep sitting here.

Course everyone else are yawning continually, which isn’t helping.

I’ve just proclaimed that maybe office work isn’t for me: “I can FEEL myself getting *fat* just sitting here – like my blood’s congealing in my vains from inactivity – I dunno how people can just sit in a fuckin chair all day.. Drives me insane!”

A veiled insult loud enough to belittle the two trainers, but indirect so I got to fat-shame them without anybody saying a word and you can think what you like about that – the two of them are smart-arse snarky cows, they deserve it.

Truth is there’s just not many jobs around the mountains at all currently because it’s Easter and whatever staffing requirements businesses had have already been seen to: really, they should’ve waited until after the holidays to call us all in here and bore us to death – nobodies got a job in the 2.5 weeks we’ve been here – even the reaaally earnest attendees.

I’ve told them I want to leave early because I’m bored shitless: these two marketing chicks have less presence combined than a single housebrick. Hang on..

8:22 PM

Oh happy birthday to my mother! For yesterday!! 🎂🍰🎂

Wednesday, 24th April 2019

God the shopping music is bad in Woolies this morning. Really bad. Worse than elevator musak.

10:06 AM

My cracking the shits yesterday has granted me “special treatment”, and I’m told I can go anytime I like this morning.

Of course now I’m free to go I’ve told them I don’t mind being here as much and that I’ve told my drug dealer I’ll be here all day though I’ll be out of here at lunch if he hasn’t got organized by then..

11:25 PM

I’ve been removed from the course for “being disruptive” and am free to leave anytime I like: next will be the nursery WFTD thing, and though I can probably postpone that a few weeks, I won’t: at least that’ll involve actually doing something more than sitting in a chair all day pretending.

All I did was voice the sentiment the class already had, most of which were already calling the course for the bullshit it is a full three weeks ago, every smoke break, every lunch break.

Like cutting the head off an already dead snake: removing me won’t ressurect the group dynamic because the trainers ineptitude killed that just days after it began 🙂

I actually giggled on the way back from the shops!


The solution is to select quality trainers who have an understanding of their target audience and screen-out the hoity-toity wankers and schoolgirls who’re just there to leech a paid vacation to the mountains: everyone smells that bullshit a mile away and trainers like that have no place in a roomful of unemployed they have no hope of relating to in the slightest.

Even the on/off/on/off woman will have the shits at me now but whatever: being honest is pointless if you’re only honest when it’s convenient and I’d rather upset a few pretense-addled fat chicks than bite my own tongue and be upset myself.

The truth is that I have a natural ability to see through people like glass and I honestly get off upsetting pretentious, conceited human beings: stabbing away at peoples affectations about themselves is an excellent game.

Truth and honesty: try ’em some time people: life is complicated enough without a world full of arseholes constantly spewing shit like politicians simply for such a base motivator as personal gain.

10,500 words so far – not that wordcount’s the ultimate yardstick – but I haven’t padded it out with mindless dribble so much this month.

Still, I want to go back and fix the older post images and proof-read/edit some of the entries but – still – I lack the patience for digging around in older posts. Hell, even this months post has plenty of typoes and bad grammer that should be smoothed-out but then it’s the next day and there’s another photo, another whatever to write about, and on it goes.

Tell ya what, I really WISH there was a point in bothering to vote in the upcoming election, but both major parties are so full of shit I’d just be wasting my time leaving the house for that.

I’d vote labour if Bill Shorten wasn’t such a fuckin’ dickhead but talking big right before an election means nothing at all.

Anzac Day, 25th April 2019

You wouldn’t believe how raw my throat feels like this morning, yet I don’t think I’ve got a cold coming or whatever so I must’ve snored like a pig all night.

Assuming pigs snore.

Feels like I’ve drunk a bucket of broken glass.

A custom winter beanie..

My mother has offered to knit me another acrylic beanie this winter but I already own several acrylic beanies and several merino ones.

The supply of beanies already in my possession plus the fact it’s still not cold enough to need one led me to decline the offer, before remembering there’s a knitting shop in town and I have any wool I like: all I gotta do is buy the wool and send it to her!

Friday, 26th April 2019

I went looking for the bits of wood I collected from I was in my tent years ago and found most of it so I’ve started a new carving: I haven’t really wanted to carve inside to date because of the mess it’ll cause but my carpet is so in need of a vacuum now, wood chips and shavings will hardly make much difference anymore..

It’s going to be a constricted heart, with the heartwood comprising the heart itself running through the centre of the sapwood, which will squeeze the heart like a snake and I’ve picked a strip of wattle without a single split or flaw to carve the trinket.

Oiled with my own skin like all these small carvings are and I’ll need blood to stain the heartwood layer, though I don’t think I’ve any 1mL syringes left for that.

The wool options..

Today I’ve gotta go in and speak with most attractive desk chick about the start date for WFTD – though really I figured she’d have rung this morning already to save me going in there, get a sheet of 800 grit sandpaper and price baby alpaca wool: quickly as possible too, so I can come back home and continue carving my trinket.

8ply baby alpaca for $11/ball (×3)

The wool has been priced and though baby alpaca is cheaper, they’ve also got possum wool and though most attractive desk chick asserted that possum is a lot more expensive and alpaca is already very good wool, I forgot to mention that the possum wool comes in larger balls, so I’d only need two compared to three of the Alpaca.

All boiled-down, the difference between alpaca and possum is about $17, which isn’t that much for a beanie knitted with brushtail possum wool.

8ply possum wool $24/ball (×2)

12:25 PM

Done, dusted and on my way back home.

I had the foresight to grab a second sheet of sandpaper too, so I’ve got one to sharpen my knife.

Saturday, 27th April 2019

I’m not a cold or whatever: that raw throat two mornings ago wasn’t from snoring, evidently.

Those dirty bitch trainers breathing on me for a fortnight – you know flu germs can travel over one meter airborne from the host simply via breathe, bitches.

You know also, that as excessively his neverending documentaries can be aired – to the point your subconscious just starts not seeing them in the television guide – I think we’ll all be a little sad when he finally does go toes-up.

Those fuckin bitches: the only sole purpose for my doing that stupid course was to re-socialize myself having spent six months locked in my place and – while that was accomplished after a day or two – the walking into town each day had just started to pump blood and snap me out of my own laziness right in time for me to get sick as a fuckin dog because of those cunts.

I’m talking about the two trainers here not the regular staff: only the two trainers were coughing and sneezing their nasty miasmic filth all over us the whole time.

Infectious, but not at all in a good way like an infectious laugh.. infectious in a very bad, diseased way.

I can taste the infection in my cough now.

Though I did learn that birds eggs get softer as the chick develops, because the chick absorbs the calcium im the egg for it’s own development and that’s the reason chicks can pop open their own shells when it’s time to hatch and emerge.

That’s fuzzy but whatever – I can’t be fucked getting up to move to better lighting, so fuzzy will do.

Sunday, 28th April 2019

Work for the dole’ starts tomorrow, and will be the first occurrence of my participation in a program like that.

I’ll be doing mine in a local garden or nursery or some shit even though they repeatedly told me the church was a popular choice, then had to explain that the Rosa and I had locked horns over the lack of security checks for volunteers which left the more vulnerable clients of the service sitting ducks in a toilet bowl of unchecked predators.

Matter of fact, I’ve had to set several people straight on the fact that nobody banned me from the place, but from being a volunteer there because I refused to shut up about how easily any single mother could be stalked once they’d left the church – especially in a town as small as Katoomba – and wouldn’t shuddup with me demands that every volunteer should pass a full criminal record check before being given a badge and the air of authority that comes with being a volunteer anywhere – let alone in the only food bank in the mountains where needy people need to go for food.

Rosa pulled me outside one day and said that everyone was talking about my website, asked me whether I was trying to get the church closed down and that she’d rather I didn’t write about the church and she cannot have me as a volunteer if I’m going to talk about it publicly like that.

I told her “That’s it then, nice knowing ya Rosa: I’ve been practically living here for almost a year now: no way I can be here as a lowly client, you know that.”, and haven’t been back there since.

I’ve said that all here a dozen times too yet still I bump into people around town who have not only misguided but incorrect information about why I walked away from the church and food bank.

The carving..

Anyway, back to the carving and while it wasn’t actually coated in body fluids last night – just earmarked for a drenching – it has now been thoroughly infused with live DNA and even left to dry overnight: no point ‘infusing’ it days ago after all since I’d only have carved it all off until last night.

A beautiful object: all it needs to be.

Since I’ve got up to hang a piss anyway and didn’t have to make a special trip, here it is in the hard light of day with only a bit of detail left to carve out plus minor sanding. As you can see last night’s flooding has completely absorbed into the wood, though I’ll coat it again once it’s finished and before I start applying shellac or any waxes.

Also shown in the photo above – though not completely – are the three points of contact that serve as feet: I’ve left three areas larger than the rest and tapered them to little peaks so it sits on a flat surface without wobbling.

That whole thing has a very polarizing reaction from one person to the next and I’m genuinely surprised by the type of people who’ve reacted opposite to how I’d expect them too in this: it’s always the non-creative, non-artists who think it’s the coolest thing ever, while the arty-farty types just cringe at the thought.

Those aren’t the people I carve things for anyway and there’s countless more of the former than the latter so most people fully appreciate the intrinsic value of using my own blood to stain a carving: the object is already loaded with emotion and omitting such a personal touch on such a personal object would just be stupid – these aren’t mass produced shit from some factory somewhere, but one of a kind objects, hand-carved from a solid block of wood in a state of extended mediation lasting days with only a razor sharp pocket knife and sandpaper.

Additionally, anyone I’ve ever created a carving for or given one two is already intimately familiar with my body fluids or someone I want to become intimately familiar with my body fluids which isn’t very many women since very few women catch my eye to the point I feel they’d be worth having a go at mm.., they’re far from retail items is the point.

Songs of Praise is droning-out the television, and though I cannot believe the stupidity of people who really think god is a real thing, maybe that’s where I need to start looking for a woman with a grain of morality that hasn’t been ‘got-at’ by the waves of sleaze assaulting society since the 1960s.

8:07 PM

Monday, 29th April 2019

We’re out of bed and in the office.

That’s it, all she wrote so far: I’m waiting for Cathy to emerge from the tea-room.

I could very easily just tell ’em I’m mortally depressed and cannot do this shit – you can get away with anything using mental illness as a reason in this soft-cock, politically-correct society these days and I’m certainly mildly depressed, though that’s owing mostly to being out of money and food, but I don’t heave a mental illness so that’d be lessening myself unnecessarily.

Mm. They cannot argue with a person’s mental state though, so that’s an easy out, but probably a card best played by I’ve evaluated the nursery and decided whether I like the place.

We shall see.

Okay it doesn’t start until tomorrow, which is just as well since I would’ve refused had they got me to walk into town only to turn around and walk all the way back out to Echo Point.

Most attractive desk chick loved the carving.

Tuesday, 30th April 2019

7:37 AM

Right so I’m awake but not happy about it.

Honestly, I don’t know why you’d ever have wanted to deprive yourself of me for a moment: living your monotone little robotic life, you know perfectly well how much colour I add to it.

Like an unstoppable force meeting an immovable object: the chemistry resulting from such a collision is the shit of shakespearean prose – most people spend their lives praying to meet a partner like that.

I prayed for you too, matter of fact – I just forgot to include “make her not bitchy kthnx” because really, I just didn’t think I needed to.

9:49 AM

A change of scenery at least: I can’t even remember the last time I got near enough to a trail for a photo of something natural and yes that’s a duck at the bottom edge of the photo.

Alright so the place I’ll be stuck four days a week for six months or until I get a job if I do that before then, is fine: there’s coffee, there’s biscuits, four of the six volunteers smoke and nobody gives a shit when I take a break or get distracted for half-hour blocks of time by the conversation going on between the others.

Only took an hour, that.

First thing this morning we converted the area above from a dumping-ground for old pots, soil and leftover plants into clean, neat rows of pallets after scraping and sweeping all the shit on the ground out the way.

I actually got sweaty😡

Afternoon I sorted and counted dead plants then added the number to a book solely used to document plant corpses like an undertaker of baby plants.

Who’d have figured right?

The place is located right on the edge of the valley backing-onto the rainforest and you can both smell and feel the moist draft of air that smells just like Leura Forest and I like that, though I idea of growing non-food-producing plants well anywhere really is the anathema to me: if it doesn’t grow into food I can eat I have no interest in the species since it’s no more than an air-filter, and food producers are air-filters too, so why waste time growing the former?

I was just thinking, that I should make a resolution to never accept a job that had me up at 3:00 AM again.

That’s random but not really: I was telling one of the old people there why I’m stuck in a stupid work-for-nothing program this morning when I mentioned cleaning the local TAFE then said giving up a permanent job in town based on an emotional outburst was pretty dumb, then corrected myself when I remembered the 3AM morning’s and said I mm still glad now I don’t have to be getting out of bed at that time.

Wed.. oh wait it’s a new month!

Gotta start a new post..



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